Thursday, February 4, 2010

Random Darts

Soooo the I.R.S. is buying shotguns. You can read about it here.
I guess it wasn't enough for them to be able to confiscate all of your material possessions, crush your hopes and dreams, and leave you penniless, praying that someone, out of the kindness of their heart will give you some cat food to eat -- they now can take your life as well. I think I'll save them the man hours and just self report to the gulags.

With this being American Idol's, er, Simon Cowell's last season, I'm just wondering who would want to watch the show without being able to see Simon insult 16 year old girls. I mean, A.I. without Simon is like listening to Huey Lewis and the news...without Huey!

Or "The Wizard of Oz" minus Dorothy.

It's like paying to see the Jackson 4 without Michael( actually, I think you can do that now).


I read recently where "Avatar" just became the highest grossing film of all time (domestically). While I'll admit I haven't seen it yet,I've heard it's a fun movie to watch.
No worries though, I get enough 3D action at home while dodging things that family members throw at me...


Headline: "Man Gets Kicked off of Airplane. Blames His Actions on Pot Brownies"

So when the I.R.S. comes to my house with shotguns to collect, I'll just tell them, "Honestly, I was on my way to pay my taxes but then I ate a couple of pot brownies , then I had a powerful urge to go buy some M&M's and Doritos, which made me totally forget to pay my taxes.

I was born way too soon. The things I could of gotten away with if I had these modern day excuses in my arsenal.
"Mom, I didn't break your lamp. It was Steve, my heroine dealer."

"Now that's a good boy. Thanks for telling Mommy the truth."

Sigh.

1 comment:

  1. I can't stop laughing!!!!!!!! GOOD stuff, yo.

    ReplyDelete